


Cleansed

by Anonymous



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angelic Grace, Angst, Bathing/Washing, Delirium, M/M, Pining, Pining Sam Winchester, Possibly Unrequited Love, Showers, basically Sam and Cas wrestling under the shower except it's non consensual I guess, one-sided Sam/Cas, some sexual references but no actual sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-27
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-25 06:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12524780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Sam manhandles a half-naked Castiel in the shower. Except it’s way angstier than it sounds.





	Cleansed

**Author's Note:**

> Written two years ago for the SPN kink meme (I wanted to keep it anonymous and only now found out you can do that on AO3) for a prompt that requested Sam holding a delirious Castiel under the shower to rid him of a curse. Full prompt at the bottom because it was a little more specific than that.

Sam’s left hand tightened on the wheel of the rented car. “What do you mean, poisonous?” he asked into his cell phone, stepping harder on the gas pedal and feeling his heart rate speed up along with the engine.

“Means it’s gonna kill him if it’s not cleansed soon,” Bobby replied. 

Sam wiped the sweat off his brow with the hand holding the phone, glancing quickly at the rearview mirror to check that Cas was still unconscious on the back seat. “How do you even cleanse an angel’s grace?”

The faint rustling of pages preceded Bobby’s reply. “According to this, running water.”

“Running water? That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“Like a river or something?” he asked, trying to remember if there were any streams in the area and running a list of the next road exits in his mind.

“As far as I know, a shower will do. There’s nothing specific here.”

Their motel was only three miles away. “Thanks Bobby.”

“Keep me updated on this, kid. Your brother’s gonna be real pissed if you get his angel killed.”

“Yeah,” Sam said, hanging up. Of course. It’s not like Sam cared about Cas at all, only Dean did, right? 

Instead of riling himself up about that, he dialed Dean’s number again. Still no answer. Apparently his brother’s “interview” with the last victim’s sister was going great. 

He checked the backseat once more to make sure Cas was still out and swerved onto the motel’s parking lot. Castiel was a lot heavier than he looked, Sam found out as he carried the angel across the hallway and struggled with the key to their room. He dropped him onto the closest bed and ran to the bathroom, shedding his jacket on the way. He turned the shower taps, carelessly mixing hot and cold water. No time to lose. 

He went back into the room and almost had a heart attack. Castiel was standing up from the bed, hair spiking in all directions, eyes wild and unseeing.

“Cas!” Sam exclaimed, starting towards the angel, but he stopped when Castiel dropped his blade into his hand. “Cas?” he tried again, putting his hands up in a placating gesture. 

Castiel appeared to be completely disoriented. The knuckles of his armed hand were white with the force of his grip, the rest of his skin only a shade darker. His lips were parted and he was panting, but otherwise he was silent.

“Cas,” Sam tried again, “you’ve been cursed. Your grace is turning poisonous. It needs to be cleansed soon or you might die.”

Castiel didn’t seem to be listening. His eyes darted from Sam to every corner of the room and back. He took a step back and when the back of his knees hit the bed, he jumped and turned around. Sam saw his opportunity and took it, not stopping to think how he stood no chance against an angel; he leapt forward and grabbed Cas in a chicken wing hold with one arm, sliding his other arm under Cas’ neck. Against all odds, Cas dropped the blade with merely a growl. He struggled against Sam’s grasp, but he was weak and couldn’t throw off even a human. Sam realized they were running out of time.

“Come on, Cas, we need to get you into the shower,” he said between pants of breath, trying to direct a thrashing and kicking Castiel towards the bathroom. He got as far as the doorway, then Cas extended his free arm and his legs to push against the doorframe like a dog who doesn’t want to get a bath.

“Let go of me!” Castiel shouted, startling Sam into almost losing his leverage. The angel’s voice was rougher than usual, shakier too, as if about to crack. 

“Please, Cas, help me out here!” Sam said, turning his body and managing to get Castiel into the tiny bathroom. Getting him over the low shower divider was proving to be an impossible task, though. After having smashed almost every part of his and Castiel’s bodies against the various grimy appliances, Sam decided that a change of tactics was necessary. Taking a deep breath and mumbling an apology into Cas’ ear, he smashed his friend’s head against the nearest wall.

Castiel immediately went still. Sam looked at him in the mirror and saw that his eyes were open but dazed, squinting against the blood that was dripping down from a cut above his eyebrow. Taking advantage of the angel’s momentary lightheadedness, Sam maneuvered him into the shower and under the water spray. He managed to wrench the trenchcoat off of him before Cas regained what little strength he had left and started fighting again.

“Cas, please, just stay under the water!” 

Castiel threw a punch that Sam managed to avoid, though he almost lost his hold on the angel completely. Their positions on each side of the divider were making everything harder, so Sam kicked off his boots and stepped into the shower, careful not to let go of his friend. 

The regained proximity appeared to enrage Castiel further. 

“Release me!”

“You’ve been cursed, Cas. Do you even understand what I’m saying?”

“Where’s Sam Winchester?”

“What?” Sam said, thrown off for a moment. 

Castiel grabbed the front of Sam’s wet shirt. “What have you done with him?”

“Cas, _I’m_ Sam, it’s me!”

Castiel was not convinced by this, apparently, and threw another punch that got Sam on the cheekbone. It didn’t even manage to break the skin, though, which was more than worrying. The water didn’t seem to be working. Had Bobby overlooked some detail? Maybe it _did_ have to be a river? Or maybe... Sam’s eyes travelled down Cas’ body, watching the soaked shirt cling to the angel’s chest. Maybe the water had to hit the skin directly.

“Cas, I’m gonna take your clothes off, okay?”

“Tell me where Sam Winchester is and I might let you live.”

“No offense, Cas,” Sam replied, yanking Cas’ shirt until the buttons popped off and his chest was exposed, “but you’re in no condition to be making threats now.”

“You don’t know what I’m capable of.” Cas was still struggling but his strength was fading fast. “I’m an angel of the Lord. If you’ve hurt Sam I will make you regret it for all eternity.”

Not letting the warmth he felt at his friend’s words distract him, Sam turned the angel around and pulled off his suit jacket and shirt all in one swift movement, taking Cas by surprise. Cas recovered in only a second, though, and quickly pushed with his hands against the wall to try and throw Sam off of him. 

Sam grabbed the angel’s wrists and pinned them above their heads against the wet tiles, then threw his whole weight against Cas to try and keep him still. Cas’ upper body hit the wall hard, the air leaving him in a rush.

“Cas, please, stop fighting me, I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Cas kept thrashing, of course. Even pinned under most of Sam’s two hundred pounds, it was hard to keep the angel still between the slippery shower tiles and Sam’s own wet body. The whole situation was an incongruous mix of intimate and rough in ways that were making Sam uncomfortable about more than just Cas’ health, which made his next action even harder to do. Sam switched Cas’ wrists to his left hand and slipped the other down and around to get at the front of his friend’s waist.

Cas stilled for a moment. “What--” His voice cracked and he tried again. “What have you done with Sam?”

Sam winced. “He’s safe, Cas. I just need to get your clothes off.”

“I won’t let you hurt him.” Cas sounded angrier than Sam had ever heard him, and despite the hot steam surrounding them, a chill ran down Sam’s spine, an involuntary reaction to the threat in the angel’s voice.

He took a deep breath and resumed undressing Cas, and Cas resumed his weak struggles too, the moment broken. The belt came undone with a soft click and Sam pulled Cas’ pants down, careful not to drag the underwear along too. It was stupid to be shy about that considering Cas’ life was in danger, but with the way his friend was writhing against him, Sam’s mind was extra aware of the analogies of what they were doing.

Cas attempted another kick, but with his pants around his ankles, the movement only managed to make him lose his balance. Sam collapsed under the sudden weight, socked feet slipping on the wet floor, and they both tumbled down. Without thinking, he yanked on Cas’ tie to direct the angel’s face toward the drenched bundle of clothes on the shower floor, hopefully softening the hit but probably choking him in the process.

Castiel landed on his front with Sam right on top of him. Sam quickly grabbed Cas’ wrists again and pinned them behind his friend’s back, then carefully sat back and watched the water spray finally hit Cas’ sickly-pale back directly. 

Cas was still kicking his feet trying to find purchase on the slippery tiles and he seemed to be mumbling something, but his words were drowned in the water that had collected from the clothes clogging the drain. 

Sam wondered if the running water should hit Cas’ chest too. Well, better to be better safe than sorry. In a swift move he turned Cas around and lowered himself back onto him, sitting back on the angel’s hips and holding Cas’ wrists against his own thighs, one with each hand.

Now that he was on his back, Castiel’s mumbled words became clearer amid his gasps and choked coughs under the water.

“Sam... Sam, hold on... I’m coming for you...”

He had his eyes screwed shut in what looked like pain but could have been pleasure too, and Sam hated himself for all the inappropriate thoughts that skirted at the edges of his mind.

Then Cas’ eyes shot open and a bright blue light shone through them. His lips parted wide in a silent scream and his body went still and rigid. Sam shut his eyes against the painful brightness and when he opened them again, his friend was unconscious once more, body limp and pliant, skin visibly regaining its natural color.

The bathroom was quiet except for the sound of the shower and Sam’s own labored breathing. The steam flooding the room was suffocating. He leaned forward to shut down the hot water tap but left the cold one open. The water slowly cooled down and he just sat there on top of his friend for what felt like forever but probably wasn’t more than a minute. 

Finally he stood up, shut the shower off and carefully picked Castiel up before carrying him into the room and laying him on one of the beds. Stepping back, the full picture hit him like a ton of bricks. Cas’ pants were bunched around his ankles, shoes drenched and dripping muddy water onto the covers. His underwear was plastered against his genitals, the elastic rolled down in places. The top of his body was flushed from the heat and his tie clung to his skin around his torso. There was no trace of the cut above his eyebrow or any other marks on his body. 

Sam was exhausted. He wanted to take off his wet jeans and lie down on the other bed to sleep off the knot stuck his throat, but he couldn’t leave his friend like that. He made quick work of stripping him fully, mind intentionally blank, then went to get a towel from the bathroom cabinet, feet squelching on the flooded tiles. He dried Cas with gentle motions, patting him softly with the towel to absorb the water rivulets that were sliding down the angel’s skin, then grabbed the covers from the other bed and covered him up to his chin.

He was wrestling out of his own wet shirt when the door opened and Dean walked in.

“Hey Sammy, you’ll never guess-- whoa, what happened?”

Dean was already by Cas’ side when Sam replied. “Curse. I think he’s fine now.” 

“You sure, Sam?”

Sam watched his brother sit on the bed beside Cas and run a hand delicately over the angel’s cheek. “Yeah.”

“How long has he been out? What kind of curse was it?”

“He’ll be fine, Dean.” Sam grabbed a dirty but dry shirt from the back of a chair and threw it on. “Call Bobby when you can, will you?”

“Sam?” 

But Sam was already out the door, wet, socked feet dragging on the cold hallway floor and then the rough asphalt of the parking lot. He couldn’t stay and watch his brother fuss over their friend, drilling Sam with questions but keeping his eyes on Cas. And then Cas would wake up and the first thing he would see would be Dean and they would start talking in hushed tones and leave Sam out of the conversation entirely. Cas and Dean and their goddamned _bond_. 

There weren’t even _together,_ his brother and Cas. Sure, Dean exerted a strange kind of unspoken claim on the angel that sent out signs of exclusivity, but it’s not like anything was actually going on between them. There probably never would be, either, knowing his brother, even though Sam was pretty sure Castiel wanted it. But that hurt too much to think about. 

Sam ran his sleeve over his face to wipe away the water dripping from his hair. He and Cas were family, and Sam was so very grateful for that. It should be enough. He knew he could never occupy Dean’s place in the angel’s heart, so he stood back and took what was offered to him, never asking for more. It was the way things were supposed to be, he guessed. Dean and Cas and, to the side, Sam.

**Author's Note:**

> Full prompt:
> 
> _Castiel gets hit with a curse while trying to protect Sam. It weakens him, and the only cure is for him to be held under running water. If not, his Grace will become like poison and kill him and his vessel._   
>  _The only nearby running water Sam can think of is the shower at their motel. He has to race Cas back there, and hold him under the shower, but Cas keeps fighting him - delirious, unaware it's Sam, convinced he's been taken and is in danger._   
>  _Sam ends up having to tie Castiel's hands and pin them to the wall above his head and use his body weight to keep him in place until Cas comes out of it._   
>  _BONUS: all the while Cas is struggling, he's calling out for Sam. Not realising it's Sam actually there with him, he starts threatening them if they do anything to Sam, that he'll kill them._   
>  _If it ends up Cas/Sam, happy with that._


End file.
